This guy is really drunk and arrives home real late. Trying to avoid the wrath of the missus he parks a block away from his home. He takes off his shoes as he walks up the stairs, being ever so careful not to make any noise. Quietly, he opens the door and tiptoes into the room. Suddenly, KABOOM, he gets an almighty wack on the back of his head with a frying pan.

At the pub the following day he tells his story to one of his mates who sadly shakes his head and says:

"Man, you are a numpty! Listen up...Here's how I do it. When I get rip roarin drunk I go and borrow my buddies Harley and start screamin up and down the block a few times, hootin and a hollerin. I then take the Harley right up to the porch and start screamin and cussin. Then I slam the door open and scream at the top of my voice - "I'm the Man o this house and I want some bedroom lovin right now!" ... And you know what's really amazing? The wife's always sound asleep...